


Smoke and silence

by Nathanaelixir



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bottom Castiel/Top Dean Winchester, Cas is in love, Cigarette after Sex, Dean is a dick, Dean is in denial, M/M, Smoker Dean Winchester, Toxic Deancas, Unrequited Love, but without smut bc idk how to write that, i mean i guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2020-09-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:46:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26255128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nathanaelixir/pseuds/Nathanaelixir
Summary: Cas thought out loud that Dean shouldn't smoke in the dark.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Kudos: 15





	Smoke and silence

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Smoke and Silence](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21836317) by [Nathanaelixir](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nathanaelixir/pseuds/Nathanaelixir). 



> In between The Rupture (3x15) and Last Call (7x15).
> 
> Im sure my translation is bad but i cant find a way to change things ??? sry

"You should not smoke."

Castiel was sat on the bed, the sheet slipping along his naked thighs. He watches Dean and the whirlwind of smelly smoke that escapes from the motel's window. He's handsome, and Castiel, detailing every muscles of his body in the dark, asks himself what divine raffle he won to have the right to admire him as he wants, before he realizes he broke the imposed silence rule.

He closes his eyes, mentally flogging himself.

He used to talk, before. He used to say things, to ask questions during sex. But Dean, never. And at some point, he just pinned his hand against Cas's mouth while he was sinking in him, and this day, hands above his head, wrists in Dean's other hand to not touch him, and eyes fixing the ceiling, far, too far away from Dean's ones, Cas understood very well that Dean was ordering him to stop acting as if he was important, was ordering him to stop talking.

Was is after the purgatory, or when Sam was in the cage and Cas didn't come back to Dean ? He doesn't know; he left many times, Dean resented him a lot. However, he kept coming back, tirelessly. So he stopped remembering the events and the dates, because they were insignificant. Now he just came silently when Dean texted him, and tried to keep his mouth on his dick when he wanted to put it on Dean's lips instead. He didn't speak anymore and his questions still didn't have answers.

But tonight, he had have a piece of those answers, even if they hadn't been deliberately pronounced. He felt it, as Dean whispered I love you in his neck, his hand on his waist. Like a secret, a promise. There had been a floating moment, during which he didn't seem to realize what happened. Then he looked away and hit harder, to run away, like his words were a mistake, a shameful weakness. Cas couldn't have misheard, because the silence of the room was deafening, but he didn't say anything, to follow dean's orders, and opened a little more his thighs and shattered a little more his own heart.

And when Dean was over, Cas tried to hold him back, but his hand fell along his side and didn't catch anything, not even what was left of his hope, probably just a product of his orgasm. Dean stood up, naked, wet, wipped away his stomach with a backhand. Then he took out the cigarette pack from the pocket of his jacket, left on the chair. Cas talked, and so Dean took the cigarette out of his mouth, which was still on him minutes ago.

"And you shouldn't talk."

Actually, they should talk. About Mary, Jack, Hell, where Dean sent him without regrets, Purgatory, where they have to go back. About them, everything that was wrong, about that I love you and his blasphemy taste, and finally, that mindless rage Dean had against him and his unwarranted disgust of him, which forces him to try to forget the sensation of his tongue with his smokes. But his Zippo's slammings are the only thing that break the darkness and the silent of the night. 

They should talk, or at least Cas should try to.

But Dean is hidden behind his smoke screen.


End file.
